Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Man + Boobies = Moobies :D

I always make the mistake of going with my boyfriend and friends to the only store within an hour of our house that has a decent number of Warhammer 40k players. Most of the time I'm perfectly content to stay at home, play some WoW or watch random crap on YouTube, or possibly do something outside the realm of my computer chair. Yet once in awhile I get an urge and that urge is to drive an hour away to watch the boyfriend play the most God-awful boring game in the WORLD. Possibly the UNIVERSE.

Warhammer 40k.

Ugh. Stupid me.

That's what happened today. I wanted to go see the new gaming store that the Warhammer players club had moved to cause I'd heard nice things and seen pictures and I honestly really like gaming stores/hobby shops. However, it's kind of amazing that whenever I walk into a gaming store (like, onse where they play Warhammer and Magic: The Gathering), there will be at least one man who has bigger boobs than me. Usually more than one. I may not have the most amazing rack, but it's there and noticeable but these guys blow it out of the water. It kind of makes me self-conscious of my own boobs. Are they really that small? Are they more pathetic than I think they are?

At any rate, the drive down was fun (car trips make me happy). Duncan enjoys speeding and we passed a cop who pulled out of his little hiding spot after we passed but didn't actually pull us over. Watching Dean have a panic attack was fun though. Other than that, it was mostly an uneventful ride.

The store was a nice roomy place, clean and with nice tables for Warhammer playing. We have a "Warhammer table" in our house but it's actually just a piece of plywood laid over a crappy Walmart table. I was honestly impressed.

Then Dean and Duncan began playing a game and I remembered why I don't usually go on Warhammer nights. I quickly became bored and ignored them and surveyed the other occupants of the store. Save for me, I saw two other girls - one who looked like she had been dragged there by her boyfriend and one who looked like she knew what was going on and actually enjoyed Warhammer.

I think at one point I counted 15 people (not counting me), 11 wearing glasses, at least 9 rather overweight, 4 with larger boobs than me, and probably about 10 who were some of the nerdiest people I'd ever seen. I don't consider myself a true nerd, but I suppose I'm a little geeky. I get excited reading about the next WoW expansion and class changes and other silly internet thingys.

These guys were hardcore nerds. And the one thing that is the most annoying about true nerds - they are completely obnoxious. They're socially retarded. Often one or three of them would come over to observe the game Dean and Duncan (and afterwards Duncan and the boyfriend) were playing. Instead of quietly standing there, or possibly politely asking a question or asking to look at a model, they were loud, grabby little monsters. They said stupid things, ragged on models that had been poorly painted, picked up models without asking permission. I may hate the game but I like the models themselves and the boyfriend is a really decent painter. So when an overweight, loud, obnoxious nerd comes up and grabs one of the well painted models, I get annoyed. They don't tend to be overly careful with models that aren't there own. Luckily, no models were dropped and broken, but I know it's happened and will happen again.

So, annoying nerdy boys, here's some advice. If you play a role-playing table top game that involves models (such as Warhammer, Warhammer 40k, Lord of the Rings, etc), learn some manners. Don't interrupt people playing with stupid questions. Don't demean someone with poorly painted models. And for the love of GOD, don't just grab at someone's model(s) because you want a closer look. Ask them first. They probably don't mind. And if you do look at someone's model(s), handle them carefully. No one likes it when their model gets dropped and they have to reglue the arms/legs/wings back on.

I forgot where I was going with this.

Um...

Yeah, Warhammer sucks.

P.S. We had KFC for dinner and it was delicious. So the day was saved after I nearly died of boredom. Yay!

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